The Joy Lemon-Blueberry Muffins Can Bring

Something happened today that I want to write down before I forget. It was one of those moments as a mom that I wanted to be able to capture and never forget. But I know my memory is failing, so I'll attempt to capture it in my journal.

I tried a new muffin recipe this morning and knew they were a hit when within fifteen minutes of coming out of the oven, all but two were gone!

So the battle for the two remaining muffins began when Hayden grabbed one of them and ran across to the other side of the kitchen.

He turned to face his sisters, held the prized muffin up as high as his little arms could, grabbed one of his ears to pull it out, and started singing, "Na na na na, boo boo, you can't get it." Oh, I could see the teasing look on his face, as he was sure he had his sisters! I sat and watched him do this a few times, as he wiggled his little bum back and forth as he sang the chant...I started smiling.

It was a moment that I felt joy.

The girls were so cute...they immediately ran over to him and tried to grab the muffin away from him...and because Elle is so much taller than him, she reached right out to his outstretched arm and plucked the coveted muffin from his hand.

I wish I could have captured it on video. The look on his face when he realized the muffin was gone and the look on his face when Elle bent over to return it to him.

I hate teasing...but this was what our family calls a "nice tease." When everyone involved thinks its funny and no feelings are hurt...and everyone comes away happy and feeling closer together. A bonding moment you might call it.

I love these moments of motherhood. They sometimes are suffocated by all the other motherhood moments (the ones we want to forget or re-do). But I've noticed they are different now.

Four years ago I spoke with a friend who lost her young son in an accident. During that conversation she said something that struck me...and it didn't make sense. But now, especially after the past year and a half...I am getting a taste of what she was speaking of.

She said that she now feels joy...true joy.

One year ago I could not even fathom that I could feel joy again. I didn't even want to try...as at the time it seemed impossible I could feel any happiness after having one of our little sons pass away.

But I spoke with Spencer about this a few nights ago...and shared with him that I feel like I am experiencing joy in a way I did not know possible. They come in little snippits...and they feed my soul. It's different now than it was then.

It's very cool.

And so were the muffins!!!


- I added a new post last night about another moment of joy which I had just over a week ago, but I didn't post it for everyone to read. But I will...soon.