This Past Summer

After Connor died I felt like writing my feelings down all the time and lately I rarely have that desire.  I do keep a personal journal and that's where I've been writing down some experiences which are private.  But I know I need to write more, as I wonder how our children will remember this past year/summer.

It hasn't been an easy summer as they have been in the past...full of trips and lessons and carefree fun.  Instead it's been filled with hard work and some sacrifices and hiccups along the way.

I really wonder what they'll remember?

Will they remember helping build the rock wall in our back yard, measuring the heights of the red rock and then writing down it's measurement with a piece of chalk?  Helping Dad put in the sprinkler system?  Endless grading of the dirt in preparation for grass.  Planting pumpkins for the first time.  Visiting California for the first time and certain people whose kindness made this trip possible.  Visiting the tidepools, Disneyland, the LA LDS Temple, and going to Del Coronado Beach and having the best time ever!  Getting the worst sunburn of their lives while there?  Watching Hayden chase seagulls.  Flying kites for hours at a time.  Eating ice cream cones and having them melt and drip down our hands?

Will they remember the fun we had and peace we felt that day as a family?

It was a M.A.G.I.C.A.L. day!!

 

I know I finally got to write Eli Connor's name in the sand myself.  Something I've been wanting to do for a long time.  A wave promptly came up and washed it away, but not before I captured part of his name...

Getting the thrill of picking lemons off the first lemon tree they'd ever seen (our kids LOVE lemons) at Aunt Renee's home. It was a little embarassing about how hog-wild they were about picking lemons.  If we had not stopped them, they would have picked every last lemon off that tree! 

Will they remember being compelled to picking up rocks in preparation for the "grass man" to come and plant grass in our backyard?  Getting excited to see the first blades of grass to come up and how exciting that is!  Being patient enough to stay out of the back yard for a few months while we watch the grass grow.  Being with Mom when our trustyworthy and beloved old blue Honda drove it's last mile and died...for good.  Faithfully doing their summer chores, including working on IXL.com.  Going swimming at Grandma and Grandpa's and watching Hayden do flips and dives for the first time.  Working for neighbors to earn money for school clothes and finding fabulous sales (way to go girls)!  Planting flowers and a small garden (never plant as many zucchini and crookneck squash as we did).

I wonder if they'll remember listening to a conversation between Spencer and I...and then one child jumping in to offer a solution...which meant a big sacrifice on her part.  She offered to give up her bedroom so that we could help a grandparent recover from major surgery...and this little device with all it's bells and whistles has come into our lives...

I've been so poor at writing this summer's events down that now I can't remember them all, and I know there's more.  Not an easy summer by any means, and I hope they remember a lot of the good things about this summer and learn not dwell on the hard experiences, which I hope will result in us being even bettter/kinder people and learning to trust God even more.

More changes coming up, as....