My Mother's Day Gift to Myself

I woke up early this morning and rather than lie in bed, wishing I was asleep, I'm wrapped up in my robe, windows open, listening to the birds outside, feeling the cool spring air start to freeze my toes (why didn't I bring some slippers downstairs?), waiting for the sun to come up. 

I've decided that my gift to myself today was to finally take the time to write down some funny incidences that have happened in my life in the past month or so because I want to remember my time as a mother and I want my kids to have a journal of some of the funny things they have said/done.

I was privledged to go to BYU Women's Conference again.  For the past three years I've made the trek down to BYU to hear various women talk about different aspects of living a Christian life and they have been so inspiring to me.  There is one in particular from last year, whose thoughts I furiously wrote down as she spoke and I have referred to them again and again.  She made me laugh.  She made me cry.  She made me inspect my life.  She gave me hope AND she had a small southern accent which I SO miss!  I've tried to locate her to thank her, but I've had no luck yet.

This year's highlights came from spending time with two dear Virginia friends who I got to spend time with at various points during Women's Conference.  The time I spent with them was not much, but it was so sweet.  I felt of their love and support and such kindness.  I love these two women and they are examples to me of being great women and mothers.

Before I went down, I was concerned about leaving Hayden.  He is SUCH a momma's boy (which I love), but I know he is also one of the most determined, strong-willed boys I know and he challenges us at times.  So a few days before I left I started prepping him.  I told him I was going to leave for a few days to go down to BYU to take a few classes on how I could be a better mom.

Silence.

Then this..."You mean you're not going to be mean to me anymore?"

Surprise from me...and a quiet, probing question.  "Oh, how am I mean to you?"

Hayden replied, "You make me sit on the bench."

He refers to the black bench that sits in our front room (we have no couch) which I scrounged a few years ago, and it serves as our Time Out bench/repentance bench/ I have to sit here until I change my behavior bench/make it look like we have a couch bench.

His view on things made me laugh.

 And while I was gone he and Spencer had a great time together.

A few more stories about Hayden.  I know I journal a lot about him, but I can't help but want to record these funny moments.  Some of which I've heard from his primary leaders at church and some that I've been a part of.

-  About a month ago I had just finished eating a hard-boiled egg when Hayden asked for help putting his shoes on so he could go and play with friends.  I knelt down to help him and afterwards Hayden looked at me and said, "Mom, you smell like a dog."  I knew that he wasn't being rude, but commenting on the smell of the egg on my breath, so it was funny to me.  Then before I could do anything else, he hugged me and bolted out the door to go play with friends.  I love the honesty in this little boy.

-  Several weeks ago Hayden was asked to give the primary talk in church.  I am SO well organized that I remembered just an hour before he was to give the talk.  So I quickly scanned my brain, trying to think of how I could teach Hayden why Christ is called our Saviour/Redeemer.  I thought of something we had used on my mission, so Hayden and I quickly drew it up and we were off.

The message is essentially this:  We come to earth and live life.  We make mistakes and do things that are wrong (we say mean things, we hit our sisters, etc.)  When we do these mean things on purpose, they take us further away from Heavenly Father and we end up in a "Spiritual Hole."  Heavenly Father knew we would make mistakes and that this was a good way for us to learn right from wrong/good from bad.  He also knew we would need a way to get us out of that hole, and that is why Christ is such an important part of our life.  He sent Christ to live his life so we had a good example and Jesus Christ would also serve as our Savior.  His Atonement would be able to get us out of the hole (this is where you draw the ladder).

Now a note to help this story make sense.  We have a few words in our home that are not allowed.  They are words which other families use all the time but we have chosen not to say them as they have been used a few times too many in our home and don't leave a good feeling.  Two of them are:  stupid and whatever (this said with a roll of the eyes, a flip of the hair and sassy attitude finally got to me).  So now both words are banned.

Well, Hayden and I gave the talk in Primary and to be honest and embarassed, I haven't thought about it since.  Until Monday.  We were busy gettting everyone off to where they needed to be.  Hayden and I were in the laundry room, gathering school items, keys and putting on shoes before heading out the door.

H:  "Mom, which shoes should I wear?"

Me:  "Oh, I don't know!" I said a little esasperated.    "Whatever."

Silence.  Then this from H:  "Mom, YOU are in a Spiritual Hole!" (note the emphasis on YOU).

I looked at him in confusion, and thought "What are you talking about?"  Then after a few seconds I realized.  I laughed!!!  I  told him that yes, he was right.  I was in a Spiritual Hole (because I had said a naughty word).

"Oh Mom, you're in a Spiritual Hole about 25 times a day," he said in a consoling way.

Oh, so true.

But his comments to me have made me think of his little talk many times this past week, of how I could better use Christ in my life to get me out of my holes.

- Another primary story.  The teachers that sit behind him say they listen attentively each week to see what he'll say next.  They have several stories, and I'll share this one.

The primary chorister was leading the children in learning a new song.  She told them that they would sing this particular song once, then sing it two more times.

The Hayden piped up, "That means three times."  I think he said it in matter-of-fact, I'm-learning-how-to-add tone of voice.

I heard that the chorister giggled a little and then she agreed with Hayden, "Yes Hayden, that means three times."

This doesn't sound funny as I type it, but when the primary teachers shared this story with me we all laughed, as it shows the personality of our little guy, who isn't so little anymore.

Yesterday was a sweet, sweet day for me.  We made my Mom cry!  My sister who lives in Europe was in the US on business and flew in for the weekend to surprise our Mom.  So I made arrangements to meet my mom for lunch yesterday and just happened to have my sister from Europe with me (along with my brother and a few children).  It made my Mom's day!!!  She cried and was so surprised and she came away feeling loved.  We capped off the evening by having everyone here at our home for dinner.

It was crazy with everyone and it was awesome!!

I am off to warm up my cold toes (on my husband, bless his heart).  I hope that this Mother's Day is a sweet one and not a painful one.  For those of you who want to be a mother and aren't yet (you know who you are), know that I pray that your wishes will come true. 

I'm grateful for all my mom's and friends whose example helps me be a better mother.

I heard something from Julie B. Beck a few years ago and I loved it!  I now quote her: "I have thought of a lesson my mother taught me. She actually learned it from the Winder family—Sister Susan W. Tanner’s family. The Winder family was a dairy family, and one time when my mother was visiting at the Winder farm, they were displaying a new strain of milk cows to their visitors. They said, "We got these wonderful Jersey cows, and our aim is that every mother produces a superior daughter." My mother caught hold of that idea. She said, "That’s the job of a mother. Every mother should produce a superior daughter."

My hope is that when my daughters are mothers, they will be a superior daughter/mother.